xxxNews Of The Weirdxxx-1

Bizarre but true stories about real people collected by syndicated columnist Chuck Shepherd.

Lance Kocses, 30, was cited by police for causing a $5,000 accident in Seminole, Fla., in May; according to a sheriff’s deputy, Kocses was distracted in making a left turn because he was eating from a bowl of Frosted Flakes.

According to a lawsuit filed in June in Minneapolis, the reason Minnesota Timberwolves basketball player Eddie Griffin drove his SUV into the plaintiffs’ parked car was that, at the time, he was watching a pornographic video and masturbating. (Police cited Griffin only for inattentive driving.)

A June Associated Press account of a deposition by Michael Jackson, given for an upcoming trial in a lawsuit by a former business associate, reports that Jackson habitually carried no money and got none from his business manager and that his only source of occasional cash was from leasing the cows that grazed on his Neverland Ranch. Lawyer: “So all your cash, whenever you need cash to shop or whatever, comes from the cows?” Jackson: “Yes, believe it or not.” Lawyer: “I don’t, but that’s OK. I don’t have to.” Jackson: “I’m telling you.”

Least Competent Criminals On June 26, outside the Community Bank in Miami, two men robbed a Brinks armored truck guard and made a clean getaway, and police have no leads. However, the one bag the men grabbed contained only the bank’s deposit slips.
(Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679 or [email protected] or go to www.NewsoftheWeird.com.) NEWS OF THE WEIRD